What happens in the menopausal period does not matter as long as both partners are satisfied. Try to find new ways to display affection and intimacy that make both of you feel desirable. For some couples, that may mean putting penetrative sex on hold and just kissing and cuddling for a while, or spicing up your sex life with sexual enhancement products like dildos, lubricants and erotic film or literature. Consider how your sexual function influences her sexual experience Sexual problems including hypogonadism testosterone deficiency and erectile dysfunction are more common amongst ageing men.
As men typically instigate sex, changes to his libido may have a significant impact on the frequency of sex. If he feels like sex less and initiates it less, frequency will decline unless his partner begins to initiate sex.
If you are experiencing sexual problems or changes, discuss them with a doctor and find out about the range of treatments for male sexual dysfunction which can help improve your sex life.
Feelings of rejection or fear of causing your partner pain may also stop you from initiating sex, even if you feel like it. Be aware that these changes are influenced by hormonal changes, which are beyond her control. Keep having sex Sexual stimulation promotes vaginal elasticity and may promote improved sexual function in menopausal women, who typically experience declining vaginal elasticity.
Encourage your partner to keep having sex. Self—stimulation also helps improves vaginal elasticity, so her masturbating may ultimately improve your sex life!
Think about sex The brain is an important sexual organ, and thinking about sex increases sexual desire. Menopausal women and their partners are usually busy with work, continuing parenting commitments, and new responsibilities such as caring for ageing parents.
You may find that you are both simply too tired for sex when everything else is finished. To overcome this problem, try to dedicate some special time for being together and being intimate.
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This may involve sex if you are in the mood. Sex is also likely to be different compared to the pre-menopausal period. Each couple has different feelings, and what is right for one couple is not necessarily right for the next.
Most couples do not want to become pregnant at this time of life, and pregnancies in menopausal women carry a high risk of complications such as birth defects. You can play a role in helping your partner with contraception , for example by reminding her that she can still get pregnant, willingly using condoms , or exploring a range of contraceptive options which might be appropriate in the peri-menopausal period.
For more information on contraception, including types of contraception, protecting against sexuallly transmitted infections, and contraception after childbirth, see Contraception Birth Control. Beware of sexually transmitted infections Although women no longer have to worry about conception once they have passed menopause, sexually transmitted infections still present a risk. As the post-menopausal vagina is more susceptible to trauma compared to pre-menopause, the risk of sexually transmitted infections may also increase.
You should play an active role in preventing sexually transmitted infections — this may be particularly important if you are in a casual relationship with a menopausal woman. More information For more information on menopause, including symptoms and management of menopause, as well as some useful animations and videos, see Menopause.
References Burbos N, Morris Menopausal symptoms. BMJ Clin Evid. Deeks AA. Is this menopause? Women in midlife: Psychological issues. Aust Fam Physician. Doing kegels on the daily or at least whenever you remember , strengthens your pelvic floor and can actually lead to better sex.
Kegels are convenient, because you can do them everywhere and anywhere! But you will probably notice your increased sexual pleasure! Consider scheduling intimate time together When life gets overwhelming, intimacy is often the first thing to go.
It can be hard to think about sex or feel desireable when you have a million things going on and are super stressed out. But ignoring intimacy and sex during stressful times can be super damaging to your relationship. A huge part of sex is the anticipation of it and the thoughts of it after, so play into that by scheduling things far in advance. Along these lines, it can also be fun to plan a little stay-cation somewhere, where you can completely focus on being intimate with your partner.
Sex does not need to be contained to a romantic bedroom set-up like we see in movies. Capitalizing on your sex drive where and when it hits you can lead to super exciting sex. Having sex outside of the bedroom can be a fun and spontaneous way to spice up your sex life. Countertops, couches, the shower, you name it! Focusing on sex can be overwhelming and even intimidating if you or your partner experience performance anxiety or have general nerves about sex.
Instead, focus on building intimacy. You can do this by taking a sex break to focus of things like hugging and kissing, which will build physical intimacy without leading to sex as it might normally tend to. Engaging in non-sexual activities that involve touch, such as messages, can also help increase intimacy. Doing this can help improve your emotional connection, and make your sex better and more initimate when the break is over! Did you know? Afterall, foreplay can be one of the most fun parts of sex.
Extending foreplay helps build up the anticipation of actually having sex, and can make the sex more enjoyable overall. Foreplay can also make sex more playful. In essence, its just spending time together after sex, touching each other lovingly, and engaging in some post-sex analysis. As a self-acknowledged workaholic, it can be hard for me to make time for sex, let alone post-sex cuddles.
I could stand to incorporate a little more aftercare into my sexytime routine—especially considering my boo s love language is words of affirmation and physical touch. Not sure of your partner s love language? Here s how to talk about it—and other convos for a healthy sex life. One Sunday after toying around with some new pleasure products, my partner and I decided to give more intentional aftercare a try.
We spent hours appreciating, spooning, and loving on each other. Also, I got a massage, which was clutch.
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